GET IN THE COMMENTS OR I ABANDON SHIP!!!
I once read this joke on blog I visit regularly and saved it as I thought it not only funny but truly a life lesson…
This post here is specially cooked and served for you, my dear, dear readers.
Something tells me we’ve done this before, hmm? But I think when we did, I was actually begging you, dear people, to come on board and be a real and life part of this blog. That is not the case today. I am not begging. I am not even appealing. I am definitely not cajoling you. Heck no!!!
I am telling it like it is and like it will be. Gbam!!!
This is a blog, a literary blog. It therefore calls for a writer/reader relationship. I write, you read. We have clearly established that we have at least that barest minimum. I write and you float in and read. Does that make it a relationship? NO!
A relationship can simply be defined as the way two or more people or organization regard and behave towards each other. It encompasses affinity, dependence, kinship. It requires communication, dialogue to build and grow and to be sustained.
That is exactly what we don’t have — a relationship.
My sister pointed out a writer whose blog we both follow admonishing her readers to stop with the ghost-mode reading and begin commenting and she recommended I do same. I said I planned to, but just not right now. I changed my mind. Why? I feel like you readers are raping me. Yes! I feel voilated by most of you.
I never wanted to do free reads. This blog — alifediary — it was initially created to talk life issues and such matters. Just for article writing and air views. I started that way. But I am a writer. Writing is my God-given talent and I wanted to begin publishing and selling my work. So, I wrote my first story and started hunting publishers.
Alas! I discovered that Romance publishers are not exactly overflowing in Nigeria. The very few there is, prefer known writers so that their jobs are already half done. That meant if you wanted to make a headway in the Romance writing world, you had to build your own readers and followers. And therein was borne the idea of Free-reading.
Unbreak My Heart, that was my first book. It wasn’t written for the purposes of free-reading. But I started posting it here and then on Nairaland and thereafter on Naijastories. What was my aim? Garner readers. Same thing happened with Operation stop the Wedding!!! and Take me as I Am.
Do you know that Take me As I Am on a Theme Font of Times New Roman is at least 250 pages? And Times new Roman is for printed reads. It is not so good on Ebook format. For my Ebooks, I use Georgia and Take me As I Am then becomes over 350 pages.
That, dear readers, is how much page work I did on that story. None of my stories are ever less than 200 pages. Most published Romance stories do not exceed 200 pages. As a matter of fact, Mills and Boon strive not to exceed 188 pages. That surely should give you the idea that the hours I put into these works are no different from those put in by writers you pay to read their works.
And my short stories, like Missing Christabel and Who killed Dana Bala?, they are the size of novelas you see out there. Same applies to calvin & cate The Pearl Ring which you are presently reading. If published, it can safely pass for a novela.
You wonder why I’m telling you all this? I’ll tell you. As readers, you get to read novels, novelas here on alifediary for free. You don’t pay nada for reading it. I don’t ask you to pay anything. You read, and hopefully you enjoy and what do you give back? Abso-freaking-lutely NOTHING!
I had a story going on on the Nairawriters site, For better, For worse. You want to know how many people ever commented on each episode while it was running? Less than six. You want to know how many have come in different places, even privately, to ask what has happened to that particular series? More than a dozen and counting.
You know what is funny and almost insulting? It is the fact that I get threatened by readers. A reader has, what we used to call in secondary school, the animal boldness to demand I post more regularly or lose his readership. It hasn’t happened to me once, it’s happened severally. And many of my collegaues experience it too.
I stand here on my blog and tell you, it is the highest point of utter disregard.
You don’t pay me to write. You read my work for free. Hello, the favour you actually feel you are doing me… think about it, I just might be the one doing it.
I actually laugh most times I get such over-bold comments. You know why? Because if many of you have the privilege, and yes it will be a privilege because getting to be a part of any person’s life is not your right, it is a privilege.
So, if you had the privilege of knowing me, you will realize I don’t kiss ass. I don’t allow people to order me around and to go all pompous and arrogant on me. I don’t allow and I have zero tolerance for rudeness. But most often for the sake of keeping the reader I play the part of can-take-all-kinda-shit PrettySpicey.
THERE IS NOW A NEW ORDER.
I want a relationship. Stop ripping me off. It is for the sake of keeping you entertained that I have my stories out here at the risk of being robbed of my intellectual right and property by unscrupulous persons… just for you. And I deserve something in return.
Today, I demand it. I do not ask. I demand it. Give me back. GIVE BACK. This is too self-centered.
Do you know, I follow another blog where the writer has been away for two weeks now and you need to see comments on old posts from her readers asking after her and praying for her. They are PRAYING for her. They are hoping she is alright and doing well and pray she returns to them soonest in good health.
I suffered reader-jealousy just reading through the comments. I have been sick. I have even come here and announced I was sick and only managed to get feedback from my regular commentators. I can be away and only same regular commentators come over and ask after me. You know how many they are? Just about four (4). I know them by name. I bet you know them too.
IT IS HURTFUL!
I am a human being. I need to be appreciated. I need my works, which I toil hard day and night, to make available to you, to be appreciated.
The new order of things says: COMMENT OR I ABANDON SHIP.
I will abandon this ship of free-reading because there is no relationSHIP. And without no relationSHIP, there is no need for me, the El Capitaine, to keep sailing this SHIP.
easy, peezy, fuzzy, dozzy.
And the other new rule? If you don’t comment and keep commenting… because some of you start of with one comment at the beginning and wait for when I declare The End to return for your second comment. If you don’t comment every episode you read, when EL Capitaine abandons that particular ship, don’t come asking me where the ship docked.
As for For better, For worse, I docked that ship on a Carribean Island but response after this will determine if I will move it into shark-infested waters. That means, killing it forever. But if you respond right, we’ll go back to sailing towards the Netherlands… The End.
This is reality. If someone is not a part of your life, they cannot come on a day you decide to smoke cigaweed and ask you why you are smoking cigaweed. They cannot. Only people you have breathing relationships with can stop over and say, ‘TM, why the heck are you smoking cigaweed now?’ It is the reality.
Dear readers, this rant here is my way of telling you, I may have started out with just three readers — my three sisters. But I know today we have over a hundred and fifty solid readers on this blog and none of them are related to yours faithfully.
Don’t be selfish. In short, you have been selfish, now I’m demanding you stop being sellfish and start giving back. If you cannot give free comments, what is my guarantee that when my books starts coming out you can pay with your hard earned money?
I am fast losing the courage to go on. I may have started strong with just my sisters and no other person but I dreamed of the day when I will have hundreds of readers, reading and leaving inspiring comments. I long for that day. Make that day happen for me. I deserve it.
Three huge novels at your disposal. Two Mystery novelas. Inspiring articles, jokes, crazy rants every now and then, lol… damn it, I deserve to see nothing less than fifty comments for each post I make on this blog. I check my site views daily and I know on days I make posts I have over a hundred visitors. But I hardly ever make ten comments that are purely from readers.
ENOUGH! I have had it.
You read, you comment. You don’t comment, I will take drastic actions and write as I please. For Christ’s sake, I have a writing schedule. I have a long pile of storylines for the new Blovels I’ve introduced. Storylines for the whole of 2015. Great storylines. Make me long to write them for you. Make it a pleasure for me to write them for you. The only payment for free-reads is COMMENTS, nothing else.
Beginning 2015, I am going to start rewarding regular commentators. And I will begin by first rewarding those who have been generous and faithful and conscienscious this past one year.
Readers stop raping and ripping off your writers. You are not doing them a favour by reading their work if their work is a great read. And I daresay my works, particularly my Romance works, are all great reads. If they were not, please feel free to tell me here and now.
I want to start seeing comments. Don’t ever bore me to death and annoy me unnecessarily with the once-in-a-blue-moon comment of I used to be a ghost reader. Stop ghosting here. This is not a ghost blog. And you are not a ghost. Live and be alive.
I want to keep writing about this because I am so infuriated. For my sake, for the sake of every writer you seflfishly rip off every single time you click on their work, read and enjoy and yet leave without so much as a welldone comment. I am infuriated and I am disgusted.
Jesus! Put yourself in my shoes for just today. How would you feel if you have to write everyday of the week — on notebooks, on phones and finally on the laptop — and then try your damndest to proof-read and most often edit — and then post, only for just four or five readers to be the only ones commenting. Then you go to your site review and find over a hundred people read that post. How would you feel if you were the writer, huh?
Enough… It is enough. We will only Write, Read and Remark on this blog or I maybe forced to only write every damn story for a price. Whoever can pay, gets to read. If it’s just ten persons, Halleluiah!
Free novelas will continue but no more free novels over 180 pages. Uh huh, I’m done. Novelas like calvin & cate The Pearl Ring and calvin & cate Convincing Cate would keep coming on this blog if you want it to. How do you tell me you want to keep reading ’em free novelas? Simple, Leave comments. Easy and simple.
On the 31st of this month, I will put up a glimpse chapter and my usual advert of my book Unconventional Proposal. Then hopefully, come January you can start making purchase of the Ebook. I know I am already three months late, and I sincerely apologise… particularly to regular commentators… but a lot of big, huge dramas happened and even now that last over-sabi specialist act of mine cost me two chapters because I just found out that the copy I had saved in my Google Drive is two chapters behind where I really stopped. No matter, I’ll take care of it and we’ll hit the stand January 2015, by God’s grace.
As always, I thank you all… those of you who will read this long rant… for reading and I hope to see a new improved alifediary readers.
I will state again, Get in the COMMENTS or I ABANDON SHIP.